I have spent most of my professional career seeking work-life balance. Even being a remote worker for nearly 20 years, the push and pull can still be a daily struggle.
Most people believe that work-life balance is a myth, but I would argue that it’s a choice.
Choosing what to do, when to do it, and sticking to it can set you up for the balance that you are seeking.
It’s also simple math, say yes to what you can achieve and say no to what is not possible in the allotted time.
Getting to the place of balance has to be by design and in alignment with God’s purpose(s) for your life.
The Key Ingredients
My recipe starts with building boundaries (aka, the bread) around what matters most to me and then simplifying my work to one key theme (aka, the meat) each day.
Here is the recipe with three core ingredients:
Morning Boundary (Bread): Every morning starts with personal time to improve my health (mental, physical, and spiritual)
Work Day (One Core Protein): Every workday has one key objective.
Evening Boundary (Bread): Every evening has intentional downtime and often time themed time with my family
Don’t worry, there are condiments and I’ll explain where that comes in shortly.
So what does my plate look like?
Monday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: Write and Research
- Evening: Leftovers for dinner, clean kitchen, time with family, downtime
Tuesday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: In Meetings
- Evening: Taco Tuesday, clean kitchen, time with family, downtime
Wednesday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: Editing and Designing
- Evening: Dinner at Church
Thursday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: In Meetings
- Evening: Chicken & Rice or Pasta night, clean kitchen, time with family, downtime
Friday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: Open Loop Day (admin, emails, networking, and planning)
- Evening: Nuggets for kids, take out for parents (with a movie)
Saturday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: Focus on Home (Bills, Groceries, Free Writing)
- Evening: Cook for the next 3 days and gather in the community
Sunday
- Morning: Devotions, Coffee, Run Outdoors, Kid’s breakfast, and their devotions
- Day: Sabbath (Church, Rest, and Family Fun)
- Evening: Steak Night/Date Night
Rinse and repeat and we’re back on Monday!!
The Fatty Sandwich Will Kill You
In a world of having so much on our plates, constant hurry, distractions, and 10 million meetings, it is EXTREMELY easy to get to the end of the day and have nothing to show for yourself! Too many days go wasted and to compensate, we play catch up at night or on weekends when this time is meant for rest and recharging. There is simply too much fat in our sandwiches.
Unfortunately, we as a society have forgotten how to build healthy boundaries and rhythms. We need daily bread, not just the inside of the sandwich!
We have also forgotten how to prioritize what is important and stick to it. We are going free willy into every day expecting to be productive, but it’s a far cry! This approach results in anger, resentment, overwhelm, and chronic stress. If you examine the schedule closely, my evenings are different each night, but they remain the same every week and provide a model of simplicity for our household.
So where do we start to simplify our lives? How can we find the recipe for work-life eubiosis when there are so many important things that demand our attention.
My perfect recipe is not to be replicated, however, the approach of two pieces of bread with one core protein on the inside is what you should take away from this post. So let’s dive into the FAQ:
Why Does the Perfect Sandwich Only Have 1 Core Protein?
For our approach to work, there are benefits to finding the patterns and designing the workdays to focus on one theme.
- One core protein provides clarity to the day and reduces decision fatigue.
- Our work week is not to be like a Sunday drive. Put a destination in your GPS every single day and know exactly where you are going and how you are going to get there.
- One core protein simplifies the overcomplicated schedule.
- Simple is not a bad word. Simple frees you up to focus on one thing. Going back to the GPS, having multiple ending spots for one particular day can end up crashing the day. Go one place at a time.
- One core protein reduces distractions for anything.
- If it’s not part of your daily theme, block it and delete it. Don’t take meetings on specific days or find 4-hour slots where you are not in an email or reachable via IM. OR vice versa, choose a day to stack your meetings but for heaven’s sake, don’t stack meetings all 5 days of your work week!
- One core protein gets you home on time.
- “Where is daddy? ” Eating meals as a family at least 3 times a week decreases the odds of your kids making risky choices and improves their odds of becoming successful contributing members of society
- One core protein helps to know your limits.
- If you find that each day has space for more + than the time you need to refresh, start adding. For example, if I am done writing by noon, this technique leaves me another 2 hours of ideal productive time to add to the end of the day.
- One core protein makes you happier.
- There is a guaranteed dopamine hit knowing that you have accomplished something. Having that one thing that is being accomplished each day builds momentum and motivation!
Can I add Lettuce, Tomato, or Mayonnaise?
YES! Anything you’re adding to the sandwich should be nourishing! It’s imperative to remain energized and working at your peak by sprinkling in daily walks to gain clarity, 20-minute naps to boost energy, or a networking call to improve your mood. I would advise adding these condiments daily to avoid burnout. It will also help your sandwich taste better!
How can I enjoy the sandwich more often?
Starting requires establishing 30 minutes on the weekend to have a family meeting. In this meeting, pull out your to-do’s and your calendars. This isn’t just a one-time meeting, it’s an appointment every Saturday or Sunday to eliminate surprises that may take over the calendar. Kids’ activities, appointments, and meal planning should be the top agenda items.
Also, use these meetings to discuss family goals, family trips, family vacations, and the dreaded subject of family budgets.
Also, commit to designing the morning where you both can own your morning routine to improve your health.
How can I avoid making a Turducken Sandwich?
Most workers don’t have the privilege of having control over their calendars and overloaded projects. But that does not mean there aren’t controls you can put into place. To start to implement in a culture or organization, start with building at least one day of the week where everyone works “offline”. Fridays are the best day to implement as most workers are charged to get into the weekend earlier and the open time on the calendar should be used to organize the following week. None of this is possible if you are in 8 hours of meetings on a Friday. Once the meeting-free day is implemented, build in a second meeting-free day, but stay online with your asynchronous platforms and instant messengers still open. Master time blocking and shut down the distractions!
The key to success is building psychological boundaries and learning to artfully say no to things that don’t align with your priorities or key themes.
Wait, I’m an entrepreneur, my days are like a Cobb Salad!
My biggest piece of advice for entrepreneurs and solo entrepreneurs is to start by also removing ingredients and keeping your business simple. Find the one thing that you are energized by and make sure that 80% of your dedicated work hours are going towards that. Everything else is empty calories!
Audit all the activities that drain your energy and are not part of your core skills. Take that list and eliminate or delegate it to outside vendors, and partners. If it is mission-critical, day batch those activities to one of your themed days.
I find it’s easier for me to address the miscellaneous mind-numbing tasks on a Friday afternoon or Saturday morning. Never toss these tasks into your deep work. After you have done this, then follow through with the methods above and time blocking accordingly. Lastly, choose days to work in the business (blogging, podcasting, coaching) and days to work on the business (visioning, product development, networking, brainstorming, training)
Will My Work-Life Sandwich Taste Different?
Your bread and meat will look and taste different! We’re human and all have a different DNA. So as you make your daily sandwich cookbook, make it your own. Know your limits and guard your time tightly! The goal is to keep a theme to your workday and keep a theme to your home life. Make them blend and work collaboratively with your partner!
How Can I Make My Sandwich Gluten-Free?
Gluten can be very bad for the gut. So can saying yes to everything that is being asked of you. When you overcommit your calendar, it is natural to start eliminating healthy boundaries like sleep, time with the family, and exercise. The key to a wholesome life is making sure your boundaries (bread) are healthy and you’re getting the bread constantly.
When Can I Start Eating?
Start saying no to things that don’t taste well on your sandwich, your life, or your destination.
Start saying yes to people, things, and activities that align with your calling and your purpose.
Pull out your calendar when you read this article and start arranging your priorities.
Enjoy your Work-Life Sandwich!